Wednesday, February 18, 2009

Terms in the Industry That Are Overused (AKA SP Rants)

Me doth think you use that term... TOO MUCH! There's plenty of words and terms used in professional reviews, sites, and message boards that just get obnoxious and/or boring after a while. Most of the time because they're just used improperly by the happily ignorant. Let me preface this by saying that I'm not saying that these words need to die. I'm just hinting at it heavily. Some of this is meant to be heavy-handed in a joking fashion, so don't get angered over text from little old me for whatever reason. Let's get to the list!

waggle

It seems some of us are just getting lazy. Why bother trying to categorizing the big differences between pointer control, gesture motions, and just plain shaking the Wii remote like an idiot when we can just classify it all as the off-putting term "waggle"? I find it very easy to discern who takes the Wii seriously and who thinks it's a joke by how many times they use the word waggle. Waggle means to shake back and forth. I am not shaking back and forth when I taking a swing in Tiger Woods 09. I am not shaking back and forth when I flick the Wii remote upwards to catch a fish in MySims Kingdom. However, I am shaking back and forth when one of those charging zomb-- er-- mutants grab me in House of the Dead: Overkill. Now that is waggle. If motion-control is too big of a term to type, why not just use "motion"? Same amount of letters, less sounding like a douche bag when using it.

AAA

AAA. My, are we getting greedy! In schools, an A was something that 90 and above or something close to that were designated as. Then what is AAA? For that matter what is AA even? Is that an A+? The point I'm trying to make is that AAA is just a rubbish term to begin with. It's as if a person is saying that the game or mechanic of a game is exceedingly greater than an A+. I view this as hyperbole, something that the industry loves using for every high-profile blockbuster-- especially when they have an exclusive review of a top-notch game. It's bad enough that professionals use this, but it rubs off on the readers. How many message boards have you visited where an argument boils down to "my system has more AAA games than yours!" What does that even mean? Stop drinking the yellow Kool-aid because while you call it "AAA bodily fluid", I call it piss.

shovelware

A lot of people just seem to just get off on misusing this term. It basically now boils down to "this doesn't appeal to me or my group of gamer so it's shovelware" more than a genuinely shoddy game. I've read and heard this term for everything from MySims to Manhunt 2 to Beautiful Katamari to Wii Fit to Animal Crossing: City Folk to Dynasty Warriors Gundam to so on and so on. There's a difference between a bad game and shovelware just like there's a difference between accidental death and murder. That difference is intent. Hey, I watch enough Law and Order!

Regardless, the thing that really killed me is when an editor at IGN called Wii Music "Nintendo shovelware". So great. Now a "professional" is raping the meaning of the word because he didn't bother to try to like a game? Goodness, this industry is not going to be taken seriously anytime soon. No, I view shovelware as your Ninjabread Mans and your M&M Racing. Not as games like Wii Fit that I just don't care for and have no interest in.

kiddie/mature

It's sort of like anything with a color palette deviating from black, brown, or gray is considered kiddie nowadays. Wait. You got a gun, sex, naughty words, and lots of violence? Why the hell didn't you say so! I really dislike the ESRB rating "Mature". It's a total misnomer. Most games rated Mature are anything but. This game is too mature. It's used the F bomb fifty times in ten different ways! I can blow off someone's $@#$ off with my sawn-off shotgun! I can see someone's ding-dong because the developer decided they want to continue pushing the envelope and getting attention just like some professional video game-making 4chan! Awesome! Case in point, they're stupid terms, and you're a moron if you put down a game by saying it's too kiddie and juvenile while going to play Grand Theft Auto afterward.

casual/hardcore

No. Not doing it again.
To elitists, stop using them to make yourselves feel superior for playing games more than people with lives.
To everyone else, games are games. Enjoy 'em!
Next.

Wii

Not the console, mind you, but all the "Wii really want a new F-Zero, Nintendo!"

...Wait. Did you just use "Wii" as a substitute for "we"?

...Holy crap! HAHAHAHAHAHAHA! Oh, no you did-int! How did you even come up with that? I have never heard of that gem of a joke ever! Puns are hilarious! You, my good man, are a comedic genius. Why do you not do stand-up? I know the U.S. commercials originally were "Wii would like to play", so why not expand that into saying "Wii" instead of "We" for everything! Man, that is fantastic! Are my eyes red from all the tears brought forth by my raucous laughter? I swear to God, take me to the hospital because I just split my $%@$ing sides with hilarity! It's sort of like equating playing with your Xbox 360 controller's joystick to masturbating except not as tasteless! You need a show on SpikeTV/ Pronto. You're gonna get one, too, by God. Phew! I'll just be laughing some more, okay?

emo

The way I understand it, and I'm not hip on these types of things, but an "emo" is someone who stereotypically wears tight jeans, wears bangs to one side of their face, dyed black, belt buckles, skate shoes, tight shirts, and is very shy, angst-filled, and listens to effimenate guys who people like you and me "don't understand" but they say it in a whiny girl-type voice. If nothing else, I have a whiny girl-type voice. True story. At least on the phone, for Goodness sake. Now answer me this: when did the term "emo" replace the word "%##"?

Regardless, lots of people throw the word around when describing Final Fantasy protagonists. Cloud? Okay. Squall? Sure. Zidane? Aw, hell, naw. Tidus? Now he's not emo unless we ARE replacing that word with %##. Now I don't know about you, but I prefer the word %## to emo, and I don't even use 4chan!

Feedback Appreciated!

What did you think of this article? Did it make you smile or make you angry at any parts (not my intention on the angry side of things)? Your comments are very much appreciated!

2 comments:

Matthew said...

I smiled at all of it. Because I agree with every last word. Especially the hardcore/casual and mature/kiddie rants, and ESPECIALLY your thoughts on the word "waggle"---GOD, I hate that word.

If motion-control is too big of a term to type, why not just use "motion"? Same amount of letters, less sounding like a douche bag when using it.

Truer words have never been spoken! :)

SpinachPuffs said...

I think I've only used the word "waggle" to describe the controls for Mario & Sonic's track events. That's definitely a waggle motion...

As for "mature", guilty as charged ;)

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