New-stalgia: New Super Mario Bros. Wii

New-stalgia is a brand-new segment gracing us with its presence here at SuperPhillip Central. The concept behind New-stalgia is to highlight recently released (within the past five years or so) games that I consider to be modern classics -- ones that I will look back on in the future with, you guessed it, nostalgia. To kick off this sensational segment, we have New Super Mario Bros. Wii to run and jump its way back into the spotlight.

What I said then:

"Each level of the game's near-eighty levels is brimming with secrets, obstacles, enemies, hazards, and surprises. The fact of the matter is that each level is masterfully designed. Each level is one cohesively enjoyable experience. Super Mario Galaxy had plenty of moments, but they were strung together by small interruptions of standard platforming. Not New Super Mario Bros. Wii. This game packs a punch from beginning to end. It grabs a hold of you in the very first level with new surprises such as rotating pieces of land, and it doesn't stop. It doesn't let go. One level you'll think can't be topped, and then the next single-handily destroys your expectations. It's a phenomenally designed game."

"Old and new are mended together wonderfully in New Super Mario Bros. Wii. Remember those spiked pillars that would smash you in Super Mario World? Now they're even larger in New Super Mario Bros. Wii, spinning and churning with rapid rotations. Airships from Super Mario Bros. 3 return with three levels of challenging platforming action. They were always the most impressive and difficult levels in Super Mario Bros. 3, and they're no slouch in this version of the series either. Enemies old and new are ready to get in your way, too, from fire-spitting piranha plants, to punching and pummeling poltergeists, giant, ghostly boos, ball-chucking spikes, plumber-consuming fish, sledge, fire and ice-throwing hammer bros, and many, many more"

"If there was one game that I could call magical [in 2009] and mean it 100%, it'd have to be New Super Mario Bros. Wii. Nearly everything fits together like a nicely-designed jigsaw puzzle. Sure, a piece or two might have been less-than-gently squeezed into place, but the package as a whole is brilliant. The levels are constantly surprising, challenging (especially the later worlds), and the game is a blast to play alone or with friends. One isn't better than the other-- they're just different experiences and ways to play. Without a doubt, New Super Mario Bros. Wii is one of the best games released [in 2009], and perhaps even a greater 2-D Mario than Super Mario Bros. 3, nostalgia goggles off."

What I say now:

Having played through the majority of New Super Mario Bros. Wii once more with a partner over the past few weeks, my thoughts on just how adept the designers of the game truly were when they crafted each level. The game constantly introduces new challenges and obstacles to make the various courses all the more original. There are plenty of callbacks and throwbacks to past 2D Mario games. One of the castles in the game has you racing to outrun large, spiked pillars (as seen in Super Mario World). You must run like Usain Bolt to reach each safe zone in order to avoid getting hit. Those pillars move might fast as they jut out. While another is an auto-scrolling affair akin to the original Super Mario Bros. where there are three paths before you, and you must choose the correct one or you will here a buzzer sound and must redo the section, picking another path to go on the next time.

Then there's the returning airships from Super Mario Bros. 3, three in the game total. Like the aforementioned castle and tradition for these types of levels in 2D, these airships slowly auto-scroll as well. Leaping on screws that spin as you stand on them to stay on top of the tricky platforms, nimbly dodging the fire-spewing exhaust ports which want to cook your goose, and avoiding the projectiles thrown by the irritating Rocky Wrenches all hark back to a simpler time in Mario's long-standing career. Alongside the airships are haunted houses where Boos and other apparitions call their home. These are full of false doors, secret exits, and hidden passageways.

The levels aren't just borrowing concepts from past Mario games completely either. There are myriad of novel and creative ideas implemented to make New Super Mario Bros. Wii feel less like a nostalgia trip meant to cash in on people's fond memories of Mario and more like a game that constantly raises the bar on intuitive level design. Right from the first level you are presented with a grassland level with spinning wheels that hide pipes that can be entered as well as the introduction of the ever-spectacular Propeller Suit. One shake of the Wii remote (what, a quick flick of both wrists is a workout all of a sudden?) sends you soaring high into the air to reach otherwise inaccessible trinkets and areas.

Even the second level, while following the traditional trope of a Mario game by being an underground affair, features something new with crystallized purple platforms that shift left to right or up and down and special walkways that when stepped on, allow you to tilt them with the Wii remote. Following a rendezvous with Yoshi, who appears in a select handful of levels to help, and a swimming stage, world one's castle brings you through a hazardous huge gear-filled obstacle course with a date with lava as your reward for failure. 

You might be thinking, "so what?" Well, that's only the first world. Other worlds present much more interesting ideas and levels. From a koopa coaster that descends into lava at various intervals (making jumping a safe and smart option at each point) to swimming through bubbles that are suspended in the air, to going airborne as you hitch a ride on a pack of skyward manta rays, to using falling icicles as platforms (and not getting crushed by them in the process), to acting like Tarzan and swinging on vines to reach higher elevations, to ascending a vertical fortress where the walls, each lined by spikes, shift left and right, to riding a raft across a deadly river while enemies like Bob-ombs, Piranha Plants, and Goombas fall on your only means of safety, to trying to distance yourself from a pursuing cloud of poisonous purple gas, to staying out of the center of a vertical fortress as you climb your way to the top, avoiding the lunges of a thick and lengthy spiked piston, to one of the most epic encounters with Bowser in series history (seriously)-- phew! I'm out of breath!

Playing the game with friends or family members is by far the best and most fun multiplayer experience I have had this generation, online or off. Working together to reach an out-of-the-way Star Coin, or getting in one another's way, using a friend's head to get some extra height off a jump while they go falling into the bottomless pit below is always a laugh. When you're really working as a cohesive unit, firing on all cylinders, and speed running through levels, that is truly something special. Even beginners can join you and bubble up when they get left behind. (Bubbling up refers to the ability to press a button to have your character float in a bubble, floating around as the other player(s) move through the levels. By shaking the Wii remote, you can float the bubble toward the other player(s) for them to free you from it. This is a tactical move as well in multiplayer as you can make a suicide leap to get to a Star Coin and bubble up to prevent losing a life.)

If I have one complaint towards New Super Mario Bros. Wii, it is that it doesn't do more to wow people with its visuals. They are certainly competent and perform well. The framerate is solid, for that matter. Regardless, everything just feels sterile. I wouldn't call it generic, a word that is thrown about so often nowadays. I would just call it a bit bland compared to something like Rayman Origins. Then again, this art style is a much more neutral and inviting one. It makes judging and seeing where to jump much more manageable than Ubisoft Montpelier's tremendous effort. Plus the collision detection is perfect as well.

As New Super Mario Bros. 2 approaches and the much more anticipated by me New Super Mario Bros. U comes close (the game I consider to be the true sequel to the Wii game), I find myself returning to New Super Mario Bros. Wii quite often. I probably just won't be doing so when a new Mario platformer comes out. No, I'll be coming back to this game whenever and wherever. It is a masterful Mario game that sits on the same shelf as Super Mario Bros. 3 and Super Mario World. The ability to play with up to three other people make this a terrific installment as does the brilliant level design, hidden secrets (such as level exits, Star Coins, and World 9), and that quintessential Mario charm. New Super Mario Bros. Wii is a game that many take for granted. It obviously sold fabulously (upwards of 25 million worldwide as of December 2011), but I feel because it doesn't reinvent the wheel or have the production values of a Super Mario Galaxy, it is poo-pooed on much more than it deserves to be. It is a game that is near-perfect, has the right balance of old and new, and delivers one of the best (I'd argue the best) 2D platforming experiences of this generation.

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What are your thoughts on New Super Mario Bros. Wii? Did my retrospective look of the game open your eyes some or not at all? What games do you think will be considered modern classics in say, ten years? Let the community know with a comment below.

Rank Up! - New Play Control!

Smell that in the air? No, it's not delicious body odor, it's the scent of a new Rank Up! in the air! Exactly one week ago I posted my review of the New Play Control! version of Pikmin 2. This version had all-new Wii-based controls and received a 9.0 out of 10. Since all of the NPC releases have been... uh... released (save for Chibi Robo, which is a JPN exclusive), now is the perfect time to strike while the iron is hot and rank this series of GameCube ports from least impressive to most impressive. But before we can engage in this activity, we must see what games will be ranked:

New Play Control! Pikmin (Wii)
New Play Control! Mario Power Tennis (Wii)
New Play Control! Donkey Kong Jungle Beat (Wii)
Metroid Prime (Wii)
Metroid Prime 2: Echoes (Wii)
Pikmin 2 (Wii)

The New Play Control! line of games was originally designed as a twofold proposition: 1) To hark back some classics from the GameCube library and retrofit them with enhanced Wii controls as well as other bonuses, and 2) To fill the gap in-between software releases. Whether the NPC line succeeded in either of these goals is entirely debatable. Nonetheless, for twenty dollars apiece, it was nice to revisit these titles once more.

6) New Play Control! Mario Power Tennis (Wii)

I really enjoyed the GameCube iteration of the Mario Tennis series, Mario Power Tennis. Its introduction of all-new gimmick courts, featuring obstacles and hazards like treadmills, Klaptraps, ghosts, and puddles of goop to give the sport of tennis some more Mushroom Kingdom flavor. The addition of power shots is something that arguably worked in the game's favor. It did slow down the pace of matches quite a bit, but they could be turned off if one wished. The cast of colorful characters consisted of the likes of standbys like Mario, Luigi, Peach, Daisy, Yoshi, and Bowser, and included atypical character choices such as Koopa Troopa, Paratroopa, Petey Piranha, Wiggler, and Fly Guy. The Wii version brings all of these aforementioned aspects to the fold, so it must be even better with Wii controls, right? Well, not exactly. The game hardly manages to read your ball-striking gestures, making you enter a den of relative frustration. By the time you're through trying to play a match, you'll have cursed as much as a classic John McEnroe match. You cannot be serious. Well, I am.

5) New Play Control! Pikmin (Wii)

Unlike New Play Control! Mario Power Tennis, the Wii version of the original Pikmin is not a bad game by any means. In fact, the brand-new controls work wonderfully with the game. The pointer is used to select targets and areas for your favorite fictional astronaut Captain Olimar to chuck his precious Pikmin army upon. His ship, the Dolphin, has crashed on a foreign planet (though it is remarkably similar to a certain planet you and I live on), and meeting the helpful Pikmin, the capable Captain Olimar search across five unique levels to find his missing ship parts. The reason Pikmin is listed as number five is the annoying (at least to me) time constraints. You have a limited number of days to succeed in Olimar's mission, and the constant pressure can get to a more timid player! Regardless of this, Pikmin is a modern classic that demands your attention, Wii or GameCube.

4) New Play Control! Donkey Kong Jungle Beat (Wii)

I adored the GameCube exclusive Donkey Kong Jungle Beat. This game came out around the era of Nintendo experimenting with their main monkey after they parted ways with Rare, the developer behind the Donkey Kong Country trilogy on the SNES/GBA, the Donkey Kong Land games on Game Boy, and the 3D platformer Donkey Kong 64 on the Nintendo 64. Nintendo made the criminally overlooked DK King of Swing for the GBA, but they also developed this ace of a title. The game had players bashing a bongo drum controller. Tapping the right drum would move DK right while tapping the left drum would-- you guessed it-- move him left. The faster you tapped, the faster the banana-craving monkey moved. After extended periods of play, one's hands would hurt considerably. Meet New Play Control! Donkey Kong Jungle Beat. Instead of tapping, you have a control stick on the Wii's nunchuk to move DK around. Jumping is assigned to the A button while smacking foes and nabbing 'nanas is the job of shaking both the Wii remote and nunchuk. At first glimpse, the game seems relatively short, deceptively so. Gunning for high banana totals earns you crests which unlock secret, more difficult kingdoms filled with new levels. It's a fantastic game, and one that the team would move on from to make a little-known classic called Super Mario Galaxy.

3) Pikmin 2 (Wii)

While the sequel still had time to worry about, you didn't have to be anxious regarding beating the game within so many number of game-time days. Olimar's employer, an intergalactic shipping company, has gone in mad debt, and Olimar's boss sends him and newcomer Louie to the planet that the Dolphin previously crashed on in order to salvage as much valuable treasure as possible. Getting out of debt is never easy, after all. The Pikmin quickly get reacquainted with Olimar, and vow to assist him on his adventure. There's even two new types to be found, Purple and White Pikmin. Purple Pikmin are heavy creatures who may be slow, but they can really whoop a baddie brutally. Meanwhile, White Pikmin are poisonous (great for wading through toxic areas) and can uncover buried treasure. Despite their being only four levels in this sequel, the levels present are large and well designed. They also feature various caves which are essentially levels of their own. Deeper and deeper you delve in search of loot and survival. The greatest horrors lie in these dark and dank sublevel of the caves. Pikmin 2 is very much an improvement on the original's formula, and the Wii iteration brings with it the same superb pointer controls of New Play Control! Pikmin.

2) Metroid Prime 2: Echoes (Wii)

There were a lot of changes going on as well as a ton of hype for the sequel to the highly successful-- both critical and commercial-- Metroid Prime. Retro Studios had a lot of work to do if they wanted to appease their fans, and they quite possibly crafted yet another masterpiece. The light and dark world mechanic, similar to what was found in The Legend of Zelda: A Link to the Past, allowed players to transport themselves between both worlds, solving environmental puzzles, earning new suit upgrades such as for the first time in 3D history, the Screw Attack, and overcoming obstacles. Yes, the near end fetch quest might have soured some opinions of the game, but when you have such tight controls (especially the Wii's version highly responsive point to aim controls) the fun outweighs the bad most definitely. Added to this game and perhaps a precursor to the Nintendo DS's Metroid Prime Hunters was a multiplayer mode for up to four combatants, all playing as different colored Samus Aran characters. The lack of bots made this mode nothing more than a novelty for me and others. That said, Metroid Prime 2: Echoes is another essential play for any self-described gamer. Note: The Wii version can only be found outside of Japan in the Metroid Prime Trilogy collection.

1) Metroid Prime (Wii)

After multiple gos at transitioning Metroid from a 2D side-scroller to a fully 3D game, Shigeru Miyamoto stepped in and suggested that the wet behind the ears team at Retro Studios turn the game from a third-person action game into a first-person adventure. A crazy idea, but it would turn into be an extremely successful and novel one. From the moment you step foot on the planet of Tallon IV and have the steamy surroundings fog up your visor, you know you are in the midst of something sensational. The map design was impeccable, the abilities' tremendous representation in 3D, and the creature and boss design were all fantastic. The story was subtle, usually requiring the player to scan data from objects, wildlife, plant life, and computers strewn about the planet to gather information. The secrets like extra energy tanks, power bomb upgrades, and missile tanks were hidden especially well. Every inch, every segment, and every room of the world of Tallon IV had reason for existing. Metroid Prime is one of my favorite titles of time, and the Wii edition makes this the superior iteration. The controls are smooth, flawless, and make precision a priority and almost effortless to do. The fun of flanking foes and blasting them from behind is always a treat, and taking down the expertly created bosses is always a thrilling prospect. If you can somehow manage to score a used copy of Metroid Prime Trilogy, then you will no doubt play one of the best games in Nintendo's grand history. Note: The Wii version can only be found outside of Japan in the Metroid Prime Trilogy collection.

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Rank Up! is all ranked out. We have flourishingly conquered yet another edition of this popular and most requested segment. Next week we will be hitting court and ranking the Mario Tennis games while our tennis rackets are still hot. Until later, have a magnificent weekend!

Report Card - Nintendo DS

My Report Card segment took an extended holiday, but it has returned. This time we are examining the Nintendo DS line of handhelds. One of the best-selling systems of all time, did the DS deserve all of its sales? Let's find out by looking at the hardware, software, features, and online-- but not in that order.

Hardware

There have been four major models of the DS: the original bulky DS, the DS Lite, the DSi, and the DSi XL. The original DS wasn't very pleasing to the eyes, and the power button was in a precarious location. With the DS Lite (which will now be initialed as DSL), turning on or off the system was moved to the right side. You just moved the slider to turn it on or off (with you needing to push the slider for a longer time to turn it off). The start and select buttons moved from over the face buttons to underneath them and near the lower right side of the touch screen. Instead of being rectangular in shape, they were circular in shape. One of the things I really love about the DSL and its future successors was that the system had a matte finish on the inside. This meant that fingerprints wouldn't show up and make your handheld's insides look absolutely messy. This is something I am flabbergasted that the Nintendo 3DS does not have. Regardless, all isn't well with the DSL. Many models of the system had issues with the hinges where they could crack, leaving the portable unplayable. I haven't encountered this manufacturing fault myself, but it is important to make note of.

Meanwhile, the DSi once again moved the power button, but this time to the lower left side of the bottom screen. A low resolution camera was added for friends and family to take pictures, but as stated, the quality of the photos left much to be desired. With the advent of the DSi XL, the whole build of the system was increased in size to show off a bigger screen and for use for people with bigger hands. The hinge problem that plagued the DSL seemed to have gone away. If not for the hinge chaos, the hardware would be graded higher than a...

Grade: B

Features

Depending on which build of the DS you get, you have different features at your disposal. I personally enjoy the features provided by the original DS and DSL the most. All models give you Pictochat, a fun drawing/messaging app that is for local players with two or more DS systems, as well as the ability to perform Download Play, allowing two or more players with their own systems to dabble in multiplayer with one another. Some games require all players to have a game card while others like Mario Party DS only need one game card and up to four DS systems.

The main draw for me of the vanilla DS and DSL is the backwards compatibility with Game Boy Advance games. There is a slot on the bottom of the DS and DSL to play every GBA game under the sun. That boosts the library available to DS and DSL owners sevenfold.

Meanwhile, for DSi (XL) owners, you have an entire shop filled with downloadable games of varying prices at your every aching whim. You have games like Pictobits, Aura Aura Climber, Bomberman Blitz, Cave Story, Mario vs. Donkey Kong: Minis March Again, Rayman, Shantae: Risky's Revenge, UNO, Metal Torrent, Mighty Flip Champs! and many more to choose from. DSi (XL) owners also get to play around with the built-in camera to take photos of friends, family, nature, and other oddities. If only the DSi and DSi XL offered the option of being able to play GBA games, it would be the ultimate handheld.

Grade: B

Online

The DS was Nintendo's first try with online... and it most definitely shows. Each game required players to acquire a much dreaded twelve digit friend code to share with other players if they wanted to enter a match with them. You can't add a friend unless they have added you in return, and there is no easy way to tell if they've added you except for hopping online and hoping. With Nintendo's poor online this meant that patches were impossible to implement (patches wouldn't show up until Nintendo's next mainline handheld, the 3DS), so hackers who glitched games and cheated were free to run amok. Combine these problems with occasionally atrocious netcode, and you have a losing formula in the online space. You can tell that Nintendo went in kicking and screaming towards online. Thankfully, Nintendo has greatly improved in the online arena, and the Wii U should show what they have learned. That said, the DS' online gets a...

Grade: F

First-party Exclusives

Nintendo brought a fair majority of their biggest IPs to their ultra-popular portable. For traditional 2D platforming you had games like the return to form of Mario in New Super Mario Bros., the sequel to the SNES classic Super Mario World 2: Yoshi's Island in Yoshi's Island DS, for the first time in the West, The Legendary Starfy, multiple Kirby games like the innovative Kirby Canvas Curse, Kirby: Squeak Squad, Kirby Super Star Ultra, and Kirby Mass Attack, and for the first time ever in a starring role, Princess Peach in Super Princess Peach. Other series got their due time such as Metroid Prime Hunters, The Legend of Zelda: Phantom Hourglass and Spirit Tracks, WarioWare: D.I.Y. and Touched, Pokemon Black/White, Mario Kart DS (the best in the series), Tetris DS, Star Fox Command, Advance Wars: Dual Strike and Days of Ruin, Animal Crossing: Wild World, Mario & Luigi: Bowser's Inside Story, a new Fire Emblem and Golden Sun, and many more. Nintendo even brought forth some new franchises to stimulate the casual market like a publishing deal with Level 5 for Professor Layton, Brain Age, Picross 3D and Picross DS, Planet Puzzle League, Elite Beat Agents, Clubhouse Games, 100 Classic Books, and Nintendogs. Nintendo created new gaming experiences with old and new IPs that really utilized the features of the DS with terrific success.

Grade: A

Third-party Exclusives

Third-parties spent a lot of their time slowly warming up to the Nintendo DS. The support was at a snail's pace at the beginning of the system's life, but as the handheld took off in Japan and then shortly thereafter in other parts of the world, third-parties jumped onto the bandwagon and began producing, publishing, and developing some stellar hits. We had three Castlevanias of the classic so-called "Metroidvania" design, two Sonic games in Sonic Rush and Sonic Rush Adventure, multiple Dragon Quest remakes and a huge exclusive in Dragon Quest IX (which sent message boards in a terrible tizzy), a load of Final Fantasy games such as remakes of III and IV, Contra 4, Phantasy Star 0, Resident Evil: Deadly Silence, a port of Chrono Trigger, Okamiden-- the sequel to the brilliant Okami, several Mega Man games, and two original Kingdom Hearts entries. There were even new IPs such as Radiant Historia, Ghost Trick: Phantom Detective, Solatorobo: Red the Hunter, Jump Superstars, Soul Bubbles, The World Ends With You, Meteos (from the mind of Masahiro Sakurai of Smash Bros. fame) Nanostray and its sequel, and Drawn to Life. Japan supported the platform more than the West, but you'd be hard pressed to find a better lineup of third-party offerings on any other handheld.

Grade: A

Overall

My Nintendo DS Lite still holds a special place in my closet, and unlike when people say they've placed a system in their closet, I still play my DS Lite. How else can I play Game Boy Advance classics without hooking up the ol' GameCube and Game Boy Player? That notwithstanding, even without the GBA backwards compatibility, there is an abundance of tremendous titles awaiting any DS owner, and now with the 3DS that can play most DS games, the library gets another chance to shine. It is not only one of the best handheld libraries in gaming history (it might even be considered the best), but it is one of the best libraries handheld or console in gaming history. Design flaws aside, the system is one of my favorites which I will always have numerous cherished memories of.

Overall Grade: A-
(not an average)

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What would your grades of the Nintendo DS family of systems be? Did you enjoy this edition of Report Card? I hope you did as I enjoyed writing it. Share your thoughts and memories of the DS in the comments section.

Rank Up! - Mario Kart 7 Tracks

Welcome to the middle of the week on the middle of a Wednesday. We're going to do something completely different for this installment of Rank Up! Instead of listing a series of games from least favorite to most favorite, I am going to be going in-depth on the most recently released edition of Mario Kart, Mario Kart 7, and ordering the tracks from worst to greatest. But before we can get to ranking up, we have to see which tracks we'll be ordering:

Toad Circuit
Daisy Hills
Cheep Cheep Lagoon
Shy Guy Bazaar
Wuhu Loop
Mario Circuit
Music Park
Rock Rock Mountain
Piranha Plant Slide
Wario Shipyard
Neo Bowser City
Maka Wuhu
DK Jungle
Rosalina's Ice World
Bowser's Castle
Rainbow Road

For a series that critics claim is complacent, Mario Kart 7 introduced plenty of new mechanics such as underwater and aerial racing as well as kart customization. The sixteen new tracks are some of the best the series has ever seen with multiple shortcuts, places to nail tricks off of, and hazardous turns to drift through. For some reason the American and European versions have differing names for a good share of the tracks. For the most part, the European version has better names such as Koopa City instead of Neo Bowser City, Melody Motorway instead of Music Park, and Piranha Plant Pipeway instead of Piranha Plant Slide.

16) Neo Bowser City

In a race, Neo Bowser City (or Koopa City in European areas) would be eating the dust of its competitors. The name gives away that the track takes place in a futuristic city run by the king of the Koopas that is filled with winding turns and neon-lit signs. The track itself is pretty featureless. Rain falls on the roads, creating puddles that if a kart runs over will spin an unfortunate soul out. The final stretch of tracks enables racers to fly through the air off of the last hill that leads to the finish line. Not even the remix of Toad's Turnpike (Mario Kart 64) can make this track very interesting to me.

15) Cheep Cheep Lagoon

From the starting line, racers make a 90 degree turn towards a dock that abruptly ends, plummeting players into the titular lagoon, full of Cheep Cheeps, seaweed, and clams that open and close on a routine basis. A well-timed drive through an open clam shell can grant a racer coins or even an item box. The underwater section has multiple hills, allowing racers to trick off them for extra boosts of speed. The final stretch grants the ability to either ride along a narrow path followed by a small flight in the air (just watch out for the cavern's stalactites), or an underwater Sunday drive (here you must watch out for crabs). An oceanic ride, Cheep Cheep Lagoon is fifteenth on this list.

14) Toad Circuit

The skies are a bright blue with three giant inflatable Toads in the air: red, blue, and yellow in Toad Circuit. The track is the first in the game, so it's simplistic in nature. It is almost a figure eight with some slight variations. Players can catch air off a ramp to fly over an overpass or choose to drive under the bridge. A tunnel then takes racers to the back stretch where one can practice their drifting or opt to use a Mushroom to bypass a big turn to save some precious time. Toad Circuit is a pleasant introduction to the dog-eat-dog world of Mario Kart 7 which is why it speeds into the fourteenth spot.

13) Wuhu Loop

Most tracks are three laps, but Wuhu Loop shuns this structure. Instead, it utilizes a start and endpoint structure. It has three sections that takes players around the base of Wuhu Island from the starting town, across the red suspension bridge, along the cliff side of the island, through the plains, and back to the town. Watching out for cars is a given, but in case you don't consider them threats, watch out for cars. Wuhu Island was first introduced in Wii Sports Resort (of which it uses a remixed theme for the track), and then made its return in the Nintendo 3DS launch title, Pilotwings Resort. A summer-themed drive through the easy going curves of Wuhu Island is just what a kart racer needs to loosen the nerves and gain some peace with nature.

12) Piranha Plant Slide

This course is split into two parts: a drive through a Piranha Plant- and Goomba-infested sewer and an outside grassy plain full of trees, Goombas, and bushes that are heavily reminiscent of the original Super Mario Bros., only in 3D. Even the clouds are the same shape as the bushes! What starts with a ride down a water slide ends up in a dank and dark series of turns. A giant Piranha Plant sits in a pipe in the fork of the road. Of course, you can try to take the middle path for some extra coins, but the carnivorous plant makes for an obstacle. After this, a series of turns full of the underground-colored Goombas from World 1-2 of SMB lurk, ready to spin players out. Then comes some rail-less turns with some pipes allowing players to trick off them. An underwater section leads to a jump that sends racers taking flight, avoiding three pipes spewing water, and reaching the outside, final section of Piranha Plant Slide.

11) Rock Rock Mountain

Own the mountain. You begin on the cliff side of the mountain with a huge pit alongside you to the left. The road is curvy and leads to a cave inside the mountain where Swoopers-- bat creatures-- flying in your path to slow you down and rock-solid columns throughout the cavern. The exit of the cave leads to a downhill path followed by a ramp that opens your glider. You're in free flight now, but be careful to avoid the horizontal pipes that rest in the way. A forested section is followed by a huge uphill section where big boulders threaten to flatten those unprepared. Reaching the top of the path once again opens your glider, allowing you to casually fly over the finish line if you so choose. Rock Rock Mountain is a fun ride full of fun obstacles and great gliding opportunities.

10) Shy Guy Bazaar

Remember Subcon from Super Mario Bros. 2/Super Mario USA? If so, you will get fond flashbacks of the dream world as Shy Guy Bazaar is a veritable reintroduction. In fact, the final section of track has players gliding across a dark pit while dodging Shy Guys who soar in the air upon flying carpets. The actual bazaar area of Shy Guy Bazaar allows players to drive through the Arabian-themed streets and vendors or take it to the top and ride along the roofs. Even the pots can be obstacles, running into one reveals either a Mushroom, Banana, Green Shell, or if you're very lucky, a Star. The brick road barely dusted by sand wraps its way through this excellent track, giving players constant opportunities for divine drifting and other splendid racing feats.  

9) Rosalina's Ice World 

Right off the bat on the snowy and icy track you can see Rosalina's Comet Observatory on the right side of the starting line. As if that wasn't exhilarating enough, you will then speed through a halfpipe-esque area where the right side houses a time-costing pit. A cavern comes and ends with a short ramp that you can either jump onto a series of icebergs (first lap only) or dive underwater to gather coins. Penguins from Super Mario 64 call this area of Rosalina's Ice World home. After exiting the icy depths, you enter a cavern full of icicles that will slow down any who crash into them. From there you have a choice of two paths: an easy path or a more challenging and rail-free path full of boosters. A final jump and a final turn reintroduces players to the beginning of the track. This track oozes with Super Mario Galaxy charm, making it number nine on my list.

8) Wario Shipyard

A waterlogged course which reminds me heavily of Wario Land: Super Mario Land 3, Wario Shipyard (or Wario's Galleon) is home to the yellow and purple-clad plumber and rival to Mario. Hazards includes swinging anchors, topsails while gliding, sidestepping crabs, broken remains of the galleon, and jet streams which threaten to push players off of the track completely. The track is heavily atmospheric, dark, and gloomy, perfect for Wario's personality, which makes me enjoy Wario Shipyard a lot. From sharp turns to being able to glide while dodging topsails and anchors, the track has no shortage of entertaining ideas.

7) Music Park

Keys that can be driven over, making different sounds as they are pressed, glockenspiels and xylophone paths, drums that bounce players across chasms, and notes that leap into the air that can either smash players or allow them to trick as they hop in the air are but some of the fascinating ideas used in Music Park (known as Melody Motorway, a superior name, in European countries). There's even vegetation in the form of grass and gigantic Piranha Plants that will bite players if they drive within the light surrounding them to be enjoyed. Music Park is a colorful, enjoyable, and thrilling track that challenges players to keep their wits with them if they want to earn that checkered flag.

6) Maka Wuhu

Regardless of it having a huge glitch allowing for cheaters to skip half the track, I am judging Maka Wuhu by its merits as a cleverly constructed track and nothing more. Like its Wuhu cousin, Maka Wuhu has three sections and forgoes the three lap structure. One section begins at the base/beach of the island, racing through mud and dirt paths which constantly fork. All this leads to a cavern full of pits that players can fall into. Leaving the cave leads to the island's castle which the track loops around. This opens up a path still heading up the mountain with players narrowly avoiding boulders that roll down the opposite way. At the peak of the mountain players drive off a ramp, open their gliders and float down to either a floating target or Wuhu Island hotel's roof before once again taking a ramp to glide down to the beach which houses the finish line. I love using the shortcut that enables players to drive through a purple pool of water in front of the island's castle, riding up the path, going through the castle, and cutting a good amount of seconds off one's time. It also helps that I'm a sucker for a beautiful sunset.

5) DK Jungle

Based upon Retro Studios' Donkey Kong Country Returns-- in fact, Retro Studios helped to design some of the courses of Mario Kart 7-- the first track of the Special Cup, DK Jungle, is like driving through a level of Returns. Even the oh-so-familiar Jungle Hijinks theme plays as you race through jungles full of Tiki Goons, Screaming Pillars that push gliding karts back and forth, and swamp frogs that will spin unfortunate racers out. During the section with the trio of Tiki Goons, one can plainly see DK's home sitting on stilts to the left of the curved path. The final portion of track has racers running up sloped paths up to the Golden Temple where the fabled golden banana rests. A last glide past Screaming Pillars and a choice between two curved paths gives way to the finish line. My nostalgia for Donkey Kong knows no bounds, making this jungle jape number five on the list.

4) Daisy Hills

Even though it is only the second track in Mario Kart 7, Daisy Hills is a wonderful track in my mind. It harks to a Dutch landscape as it has a vibrant village surrounding the starting line, full of windmills and hot air balloons soaring in the bright blue sky above the track. In fact, the windmill blades and balloons become hazards as you fly through the sole flying section of the track. As for the first portion of the track, there's plenty to take in here as well. You're constantly going uphill, bypassing verdant fields of flowers and grass, using logs as a means to trick off of and goats that block the road at certain sections of track. Daisy Hills may be an early introduction to flight in Mario Kart 7, but is one of the more impressive rides in the game.

3) Mario Circuit 

I like this version of Mario Circuit for its simplicity. It's a gorgeous track with grassy fields, smooth, paved, cement roads (sometimes sandy paths), and lovely cherry blossom trees surrounding the curvaceous nature of the course. The petals fall on the road as you drive by. My favorite part of Mario Circuit is when you careen off a ramp, bounce off a red mushroom trampoline, make the trip towards Peach's Castle, and drive up the red-carpeted spiral road inside Her Majesty's home. What follows is another ramp that has players opening their gliders, flying over pipes that blast out hot air, perfect for catching even more air, before curving into a warp pipe tunnel that leads to the finish line for the next lap. The track is quaint, delightful, and a feast for the eyes. I normally enjoy Mario Circuit tracks in Mario Kart games, and this version is no different.

2) Bowser's Castle

If there is a constant in Mario Kart, it is that the Bowser's Castle tracks are one of the better courses in each installment. That tradition continues with Mario Kart 7's iteration of Bowser's Castle. Beginning with a ramp to glide straight into either the top floor or bottom floor of the castle. Either entrance leads to the same place. What follows is a series of hallways full of crushing Thwomps and later a pool of lava under a quick shortcut. Whichever way one chooses gets players by a rotating wooden wheel that after it concludes leads players into an underwater portion of track, full of lava geysers and pools of the hot-to-touch substance. Exiting the water grants racers access to a mountain path full of dangerous curves all culminating in a glide to the finish line. This is one of the only courses where you are supposed to fly over the line. In fact, you're supposed to soar through a big ring that signals the end of the track.

1) Rainbow Road

The ultimate track in Mario Kart 7 and the final Special Cup track, Rainbow Road keeps the trend of extravagant track designs for the series of courses going strong. Like Wuhu Loop and Maka Wuhu, Rainbow Road uses the three section structure. From racing around whole planets to driving on the face of a low gravity, Chomp-covered moon, Rainbow Road is a wild ride. The majority of the track has no rails, so falling off is especially easy to do. The final part of the course is by far my favorite as it allows players to glide through star gates a la Super Mario Galaxy, speeding through the air instead of dealing with the hazardous, gap-filled track below. The last incredibly dangerous turn can make or break a race for a given player. Make sure your nerves are calm, your drifting is true, and you driving skills are top of the line. Mario Kart 7's Rainbow Road takes you through an epic intergalactic adventure through the boundaries of space all within the time span of three minutes.

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What a workout for the fingers that was! What are your favorite Mario Kart 7 tracks? Let the SuperPhillip Central community know in the comments section.

Rank Up! - Excite series

The Rank Up! train chugs along, and this time we are checking out the blistering fast Excite series. Rank Up! is no stranger to the SPC faithful, but for those unaware, this segment is where I rank several items in a series from least favorite to most favorite. It's as simple of a concept as you can get! Still don't understand? Why not read on? You're sure to get the gist of it. But first, what games will I be ranking up this go around? Note: The arcade version of Excitebike is not listed as machines are hard to find.

Excitebike (NES)
Excitebike 64 (N64)
Excite Truck (Wii)
Excitebots: Trick Racing (Wii)
Excitebike: World Rally (WiiWare)

Originally released in 1985, Excitebike roared and revved its way onto the Nintendo Entertainment System with motocross-styled gameplay, side-scrolling intensity, and plenty of crashes and spills for the masochist to adore. It would be over a decade for a sequel to happen, and it would bring the series into three dimensions with Excitebike 64. Two generations later, Nintendo would swap out the bikes for trucks in Excite Truck. Then, several years later, swap out trucks for bots. For a series that will get your pulse pounding, the Excite franchise is the ticket.

5) Excitebike (NES)

The originator, Excitebike on the Nintendo Entertainment System is a racer unlike many others. You can choose to play in two ways: 1) by your lonesome against the clock, or 2) against several CPU racers. Either way, there are only so many times you can do either of this tasks before boredom sets in. There is a track creator, but this suffers from two problems (two seems to be a popular number here): 1) the amount of pieces available is limited, and 2) you cannot save your creations on the NES version. (This changed with the 3D Classics iteration on the 3DS.) What you are left with is a title that may have been exciting back when it released in 1985, but it is now an ancient relic and a reminder of how far the series has really come.

4) Excitebike 64 (N64)

The nineties were rad and all, but the 00's brought us a new 3D Excitebike in Excitebike 64. Racing against five other opponents through one of twenty indoor or outdoor motocross racetracks, jockeying for position, and pulling off mad tricks were but some of the activities you could do in the game. Who didn't love a rousing game of soccer while riding aboard motorbikes, or climbing up an increasingly steep mountain as you aim to reach the top? Sure, crashing was easy to accomplish (especially for the timid), but that doesn't stop Excitebike 64 from being a stellar entry in the Excite legacy.

3) Excitebike: World Rally (WiiWare)

Taking the idea of the original NES Excitebike and giving the game an isometric view, Excitebike: World Rally (for this month only is available for North American Club Nintendo members for a small coin fee) gave players a letter grade depending on their time on each race, set across the world. Places like Canada, London, Japan, and Mexico were just some of the exotic locales players could virtually visit. By tilting the Wii remote, you tilted your motorbike to land correctly off of slopes to keep your speed high. How else will you get those record times? I greatly enjoyed my time with World Rally with the Wii points it cost me, so getting the game (up until April 30) with Club Nintendo coins should be a no-brainer! Download your copy of this game today!

2) Excite Truck (Wii)

Excite Truck launched with the Wii back in 2006. Seems so long ago, doesn't it? And while most of the spotlight shined down on a little known series called The Legend of Zelda, I had just as much pleasure playing through the insane racing experience known as Excite Truck. These trucks certainly packed a wallop as they were heavy suckers, able to slam into other opponents and send them flying. Introduced to this game was the concept of earning stars for your driving performance. Of course, winning netted you an abundant amount of stars, but doing tree runs (driving through narrow paths lined by dangerous tree hazards), doing incredible aerial acrobatics, and other sensational stunts earned you great accolades as well. The terrain deformation which changed the ground when you passed over a certain icon could send your adversaries soaring if they were unfortunate enough to be racing in front of you. Excite Truck keeps on truckin', and for that I award it with the number two spot.

1) Excitebots: Trick Racing (Wii)

Those of you who know me could smell this game coming from miles away as number one, couldn't you? I gush over this game at every opportunity I get, so why not gush over it now? Excitebots: Trick Racing is an absolutely manic experience. And I mean that in a positive way. It released to no fanfare, but I will forever be trumpeting its stellar gameplay and entertaining online. Where else can you win a race overall by kicking field goals, scoring soccer goals, flipping ten times around a vertical bar, collecting the ingredients to make the fabled Super Sandwich, gathering a handful of butterflies, and creating colossal crashes? I am drawing a blank, and you are probably too. Then there's gambling stars online in races. You can bet up to 5,000 per race, and if you win, you can earn up to five times your bet. You can even play a game of poker as you race. The zany nature of the game is unmatched in the arcade racing genre, and I can only hope Monster Games is working on the next installment despite the low sales (good idea letting no one know about the game, Nintendo).

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Okay now, be honest. Who saw number one coming? How would you personally order the Excite games? I almost forgot all about the WiiWare game. How embarrassing would that have been? Anyhow, please express your opinion on this edition of Rank Up! in the comments section!

Report Card - Sony PSP

It's Thursday, so that must mean it's time to head back to class for another edition of Report Card! Today's subject is none other than Sony's PlayStation Portable or PSP. There are but a few games left to be released for the little-handheld-that-could, so allow me to grade everything from the hardware to the games the system has!

Hardware

The build of the PSP is fairly light for all the power the system possesses. The screen itself is 16:9, offering an exemplary view of gameplay. The system is the only handheld device to have an optical disc format known as the UMD or Universal Media Disc. These discs allowed lots of storage for games, but it also meant long loading times. Meanwhile, the battery life of the system is surprisingly good with a charge lasting anywhere between 4.5–7 hours. Not bad! The system takes about an hour-and-a-half to charge the battery. As for the controls of the PSP, the d-pad feels nice with each direction (left, right, up, and down) being its own individual button with the triangle, square, circle, and X buttons feeling great to press in as well. On the bottom of the PSP is the home button that can take you back to the XMB of the system, the volume controls (- and +), the brightness button, a button that sends you to the music player, and the select and start inputs. My main problem with the PSP comes from the analog nub, located under the d-pad. It's like a little disc that you slide around. It's uncomfortable for games that have three-dimensional gameplay, and for titles that require both the d-pad and the nub like Monster Hunter, for instance, you have to hold your hand like a claw. That notwithstanding, you have a technical beast on your hands with the PSP, a system that won't set you back in the cash department by much.

Grade: B

Features

The PSP prided itself in being a multimedia hub for gamers. It marketed itself this way to differentiate the system from its competitor, the Nintendo DS. The PSP has an MP3 player which you can store music to a memory stick and then play music from the system's speakers or through headphones. Though, I must admit that carrying around the large but thin system can be difficult to do. Regardless, outside of music functions, the PSP received its own line of downloadable games known as PS Minis. There's an abundant array of titles to be purchased and played, and the selection is quite good. Sony also dabbled in connectivity between the PSP and its latest home console, the PlayStation 3, as well as the Internet.

Grade: B-

Online

The PSP utilizes Wi-Fi play, so there's no need for wires to be connected to the system. Unlike Nintendo, which stumbled heavily with their online and went in kicking and screaming, Sony's online for the PSP is tremendous and easy to use. Online games like Resistance: Retribution, Hot Shots Golf: Open Tee 2, and MotorStorm: Arctic Edge offer simple access to the various multiplayer functionality each game contains. The online is usually lag-free and the entertainment value through playing with friends or total strangers is astounding.

Grade: B

First-party Exclusives

Behind Nintendo, Sony is a fantastic first party, and they deliver greatly on content for their systems. But unlike Nintendo, Sony does not mind investing heavily in new IPs, even at the expense of killing off old ones. We've seen quirky titles like the colorful LocoRoco, the rhythm-based war game Patapon, and the Sackboy-starring LittleBigPlanet. Then there's old standbys like the duo of PSP-exclusive God of War games, two off-shoots that surpassed the PS3 console installment, Hot Shots Golf: Open Tee 1 and 2, the ice-cold racing of MotorStorm: Arctic Edge, the third-person shooting bliss of Resistance: Retribution, and don't forget the lombax and robot pair of Ratchet & Clank in Size Matters. Even classic franchises returned like Syphon Filter and the F-Zero-inspired Wipeout. Sony definitely delivered on first party content with the PSP, but I feel they could have put their A teams on the games instead of their B and C teams.

God of War: Ghost of Sparta

Grade: B


Third-party Games

We already have come to terms that Sony's studios delivered on the PSP. Well, if Sony delivered on the first party front, then third parties mailed first class with delivery confirmation. The biggest franchises ended up on the system including Metal Gear Solid, Final Fantasy, Kingdom Hearts, Grand Theft Auto, Tactics Ogre, Star Ocean, Sonic the Hedgehog, Castlevania, Mega Man, Ys, and the title that cemented the PSP as a fierce competitor for the Nintendo DS, Monster Hunter. Sure, sales outside of Japan for PSP software was lukewarm at best, but the quality content from third parties certainly makes the system rank up there with the better of handheld libraries.

Monster Hunter Freedom Unite

Grade: A-


Overall

When Sony announced they were entering the portable market, many so-called "unbiased journalists" claimed it was the end of Nintendo's dominance in the handheld side of things, even though no games were revealed yet. Even though the PSP failed to defeat Nintendo's DS, it did become a serious competitor for Nintendo. It gained a fair share of third party and market mind share, and it also earned itself a legion of happy fans. This is all for good reason as Sony's first foray into the portable arena is one of my favorite handhelds period. It's sleek, it's sexy, it has a library that is hard to resist, it has an excellent set of features, and it's just fun to play. Here's hoping the Vita can get up and dust itself off because I'm still looking for an excuse to pick one up; Sony just isn't giving me any reason to.


Overall Grade: B+
(not an average)

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Do you agree with my assessment of Sony's PSP? Piracy damned it to failure, but it will always hold a special place in my heart. Let your comments about this installment of Report Card be heard/read below.

Rank Up! - Indiana Jones

Let's cap off the week with Rank Up! We're going off-topic this time with Indiana Jones! The Indiana Jones movies are some of the best blockbusters I have ever witnessed on this great earth of ours. I don't always watch movies, but when I do, I drink Dos Equis. ...Anyway... I was going to make a top five list of my favorite movie trilogies, but why not cut out the middleman and just do Rank Up!? These four movies are the ones I always watch when they appear on television, even though I already own all of them and can watch them unedited at any time. Any fan knows what four movies I'll be ranking, but for those that don't, here you are:

Indiana Jones and the Raiders of the Lost Ark
Indiana Jones and the Temple of Doom
Indiana Jones and the Last Crusade
Indiana Jones and the Kingdom of the Crystal Skull


With a trademark whip, fedora, leather jacket, fear of snakes, wit, and five o'clock shadow, Indiana Jones is the most legendary fictional archaeologist on the planet. His movies have grossed nearly two billion dollars worldwide, and for good reason-- they are incredibly entertaining adventures that take you for a wild ride across the far corners of the earth. When Harrison Ford puts on the familiar wardrobe of Jones, you know you're in for something special.

4) Indiana Jones and the Kingdom of the Crystal Skull


While the other three Indiana Jones movies deal with biblical mythos, The Kingdom of the Crystal Skull dealt with aliens. The two decade wait between Last Crusade and this movie made it so it would have been impossible for Crystal Skull to live up to the hype. And it was impossible. The main villain wasn't very foreboding, Jones' son was played by Shia Lebeouf, an awful actor that should have stuck with the Disney Channel and one that I'm sick of Spielberg shoving down people's throats, and the infamous fridge scene was implausible at best. That said, I really enjoyed seeing Marion Ravenwood return as Jones' love interest and marrying her longtime boyfriend, some of the action scenes were entertaining (though Shia swinging from vine to vine like Donkey Kong with a bunch of monkeys was stupid), and the trademark comedy of the franchise was present and accounted for.

3) Indiana Jones and the Temple of Doom


The only Indiana Jones movie that had nothing to do with the others, the Temple of Doom was decidedly the darkest of the four movies. When you have hearts being pulled out from people's chests, human sacrifices into scalding lava, and Indiana Jones being possessed, you have some disturbing imagery to see. That doesn't mean the movie isn't bad. Sure, Willie was incredibly obnoxious, but Short Round was funny enough. Scenes like the dinner from hell, the mine cart chase, and the spike room booby trap where Jones says "We are going to die" in grumpy fashion make for some sublime entertainment. The villain was delightfully evil and his plan of stealing a village's children to mine for the final Shankara stone made for the desire for Jones to kick some bad guy butt. The dark nature of the film turned me off a little, but it is still a great movie.

2) Indiana Jones and the Raiders of the Lost Ark


The very first Indiana Jones movie took us to what our hero does best, taking treasure from a booby trap-infested area. Of course, all of his work would be for nothing as the villain of the film, Bellock, would take the golden idol from Indiana. We would first see Jones's love interest, Marion Ravenwood, learn of his fear of snakes early in the film (and see how he would have to face it in the asp-filled Well of Souls), and discover that Jones is one funny guy (like when he was facing a saber-clad swordsman and basically said the hell with it and nonchalantly shot him). The desert chase, the chase through the city streets of Cairo with Marion in one of many baskets, and the final scene where the fury of the ark rains down on the Nazi horde. To say this movie is a classic is a disservice. It is mythical in quality.

1) Indiana Jones and the Last Crusade


I have chosen... wisely. River Phoenix as a young Indiana Jones (he's named after the dog, y'know) was an interesting look into the early life of the hero. We saw how he got his famous fedora, where he began his whip training, and how he got his phobia of snakes. The actual plot of finding the ultimate treasure, the holy grail, was intensely intriguing and fun to watch. The relationship between Indiana and his father was adorable and warmed my heart. Scenes like the church turned library in Venice ("X marks the spot"), the boat chase, the castle revelations, the motorcycle chase, Hitler signing Jones' journal in Berlin, the blimp hilarity ("no ticket!"), the tank battle, and so many more memorable scenes make Indiana Jones and the Last Crusade my personal favorite Indiana Jones film.

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We're not done with this week on SuperPhillip Central. A Nintendo Direct is planned for tonight, offering new news and hopefully news of new games. Stay tuned for all the fun!